The entire purpose of this post is to point out all things Wagnerian that are available for sale on Etsy. Are you all ready for this?
While first perusing Etsy one might not initially find some good Wagnerian gems. In fact, you're probably gonna see a whole lot of dutch ovens (this one costs $595.00!):
But eventually you'll find some delightful items. A guy in California is currently selling posters of the Ring Family Tree for a pretty cheap price ($20.00). I might buy one. No joke.
And last but certainly not least, feel free to strut around at the gym or at your ultimate frisbee match (I'm assuming) in your Richard Wagner t-shirt ($12.00):
We live in an age where brevity is the soul of...well, it's basically our soul. It's an age where there is a truncated manner of expressing that something is too long, and therefore that we didn't read it (TL:DR). An age where an entire form of communication has been constructed around images/clips/animated GIFs to express our sentiments and feelings (Tumblr). An age where a medium for exchanging information limits our responses to 140 characters or less (Twitter).
And yet, somehow we love sprawling, time-consuming, wordy epics. For those who feel that they are TL, these epics are available in multiple media forms, such as the movie franchises of Lord of the Rings or Harry Potter [Ed. note: it would probably take less time to read The Hobbit than to watch all three movies]. However, I don't want to discount the fact that people are reading books, long books that one might assume are TL, but that, in fact, people do read (which, confusingly, is also DR). In fact, we are almost inundated with epics in our culture, possibly to an unprecedented degree:in addition to the ones listed above, there is also Stephen King's Dark Tower, George R. R. Martin's Game of Thrones, and even epic-lite in those Twilight books (which also spawned Fifty Shades of Grey. This is probably not epic, unless you are referring to epically bad writing).
Why do we love epics so much? Maybe the better question is, when have we not loved epics? One of the oldest recorded works of literature is The Epic of Gilgamesh, of course. Countless other examples have survived through the ages. Even for those unfamiliar with the originals, the classical epic continues to exist in the cultural imagination in forms such as Troy. But there is a significant difference here. I suspect that your average person on the street would not be as familiar with the Iliad even when it did star Brad Pitt or the Chanson de Roland [Ed. note: this one kind of goes on, sometimes, in places, while fair Roland climbs a hill for what feels like forever, so maybe it is good that we are not so familiar with that one any more], but that this same person would be familiar with the modern versions listed above. So perhaps the question is better framed as, why do we love these epics?
You may be wondering why I haven't mentioned the most sprawlingest, time-consumingy epic of our age, which has to be Star Wars, especially when you consider the wealth of literature, film, commentary, and other cultural references that it has spurred [Ed. note: there is even a 70s variety show holiday special, which you would think would be hysterically funny because it has to be so bad, but then somehow transcends to an entirely new level of bad that you never even thought possible, even in your wildest dreams. If that's not 70s enough for you, then how about the disco medley of themes from the original movie as featured onDutch television?]. Indeed, this post was motivated by the fact that I have consumed an alarming quantity of Clone Wars episodes now that they have become available on Netflix Instant. For the sake of my dignity, I will refrain from telling you where I am in terms of the whole series [Ed. note: Chewbacca has shown up]. Part of Star Wars' appeal, of course, is that it dabbles in many of the same kinds of themes that are so common in epics throughout the ages. There is the hero on his quest, in the form of Luke (and, as we learn in the earlier movies, his father). There is the conflict between father and son. There are hints that a larger power binds us together, but can also be harnessed to pull us apart; in the Iliad, these were the gods, whereas in Star Wars, it's The Force. There is the fear of death and questions about the afterlife, which is found all the way back with Gilgamesh. There are a series of wandering characters that have either lost their actual homes (the Jedi in the later movies, Leia after the destruction of Alderaan) or their perceived ones (Anakin, which is one of the routes to his downfall). Undoubtedly, these timeless conflicts are part of why Star Wars remains so appealing--in fact, there is a Jungian analysis of an episode of Clone Wars that seeks to uncover some of the age-old themes contained within this particular series.
However, I don't think that these themes are the only reasons that epics are so hip right now. Instead, I think that it is the possibility unveiled in the epic world, and the ability to translate that 'world' into a form of reality--or at least a form of online reality--in a way that never existed before. To fully get this idea, imagine if Wagner's Ring cycle came out now. People would make a Wagnerpedia to trace characters and backgrounds. There would be Wagner blogs, Wagner websites, and general Wagneriana as everyone tried to find even more hidden connections between each of the music dramas--this does exist, in a way, but it has been sanctioned instead as scholarly work and musicology instead of fandom. I totally see a graphic novel. In fact, I totally want to see a graphic novel and someone should get on this. Fans did exist, in a way, even back when these works debuted. They created 'listening guides' so that audiences could follow along with the themes (German musicology scholar Christian Thorau has discussed the importance of the leitmotiv as a concept in his book Semantisierte Sinnlichkeit, if you are interested in finding out more on this topic). But an entire Wagner world was out of most people's reach, unless you happened to be King Ludwig of Bavaria, who re-created the grotto from Wagner's Tannhäuser at his Linderhof Palace:
Probably not the best use of taxpayer money
I would like to submit that part of the fascination with epics now is that we have an unparalleled way of visualizing the worlds that are contained within them. These worlds can emerge in obvious ways, as in film adaptations, but there are even more ways in which these worlds are being brought to life:
1) New Zealand has actual Lord of the Rings tours so that you can immerse yourself in the landscape seen in the film--or, if you prefer, the vision of the landscape found in the books as imagined by Peter Jackson:
Actual epic-looking figure in foreground will likely not be part of your tour
2) There is Harry Potter Land (better known as The Wizarding World of Harry Potter). It exists at Universal Studios in Orlando, FL. Not only can you 'see' Harry Potter, you can also 'live' parts of the books by consuming such delicacies as butterbeer or candy treats from Honeydukes:
I selected this photo because I feel like no one would mistake these park-goers for Hogwarts students
3) To the best of my knowledge, there is no Star Wars Land, or if there is, it is wholly housed in some guy's basement (don't worry, Disney is already on this). And there have been virtual Star Wars worlds, in the form of the MMORPG The Old Republic. This expanded world also exists in digital form through the Wookieepedia, a website that (as you may have guessed) replicates Wikipedia, only for the universe of Star Wars. It is a remarkably comprehensive chronicling of every possible character, planet, or other feature to do with the Star Wars universe. In fact, it is so comprehensive, that if you need basic information about some character, you may sometimes find yourself reading the article introduction, obtaining the basic facts that you wanted, then realizing that there remains an entire article whose information is not even necessary. Take, for instance, the Nightsisters, which has a four-paragraph introduction providing an outline of their history and purpose, then has eight more subsections in case you want to know more (it's okay to say TL:DR here. Don't feel bad. If you have no idea who the Nightsisters are, or why they are important to the plot of Star Wars, as I mentioned above, Clone Wars is on Instant Netflix).
[Ed. note: I have read the entire Nightsisters article]
It's worth taking a moment to consider the history of the encyclopedia, which originated in the Enlightenment as a means of discovering, classifying and documenting the world as interest in science overtook belief in religion. We take encyclopedias for granted now, since we have such easy access to an unprecedented amount of information; even (the much reviled by those of us who teach) Wikipedia provides a wealth of knowledge about arcane topics that may not be found in any other resource. Where else can you turn quickly when you forget the names of the Thundercats, for example? Just as Wikipedia documents a more complete picture of our world than its print forebears like Encyclopedia Britannica--which does not have information about the Thundercats--a project like Wookieepedia gives the impression that it is documenting a world that is fully developed, coherent, cohesive, and operates as a unit. Without modern technology, such documentation would be virtually impossible. It is this epic world-building, I would argue, that keeps epic storytelling relevant in our post-modern world.
To finish up, enjoy the modified Clone Wars version of the Star Wars theme, which has been changed so that it is more militaristic and less heroically bombastic--this is, of course, a universe at war:
Our previous post on "Kanye Wagner" appears to have been a hit. Zoe said the only more impressive way to top the response to our blog so far would be if 'Ye himself were to grace this blog with his presence. Preferably by shouting at us in all caps:
Kanye: WHO IS THIS WAGNER PERSON I DO NOT KNOW HIM WHY ARE YOU COMPARING ME TO HIM I AM BETTER THAN THAT I AM A GOD. I AM NOT THE BLACK WAGNER I AM WAGNER HIMSELF COME BACK AS A MARTYR TO SOCIETY YOU CANNOT DESTROY US.
That would certainly be the crowning achievement for Schenkerian Gang Signs.
So thanks, everyone, for the positive response! And I would like to use this blog space to encourage you all to occasionally leave comments in the style of Kanye (all caps, little punctuation). For advice on how to do so, please turn to Zoe. She has a gift for capturing Ye's shouty voice. Her Kanye-style raps are the stuff of legend. What dreams are made of, really.
Exhibit A: YOU MIGHT THINK THAT YOU KNOW WHO I AM, BUT YOU CAN'T 'CAUSE I'M 'YE AND I STAND OUT FROM ALL OTHERS FROM THE PAST AND THE PRESENT AND THE FUTURE I PRETTY MUCH COME FROM THE FUTURE SO I AM AHEAD OF YOU. YOU SEE THIS VERSE? IT DON'T EVEN RHYME, WHO HAS THE TIME? EXCEPT AT THE END THERE, YOU SEE WHAT I DID?
I don't know when this happened, but by late 2011/early 2012 I had started to develop a suspicion about the musician, rapper, beat sampler, fashion designer, "artiste," and temper tantrum thrower named Kanye West that over time has hardened into a theory. His unruly behavior, his megalomania, his grand posturing, and his quasi-religious sentiments of martyrdom reminded me of another pompous, self-obsessed musician from another era altogether: the German composer Richard Wagner.
Is it possible that Kanye West is simply Richard Wagner haunting us from the grave? Are they musical, metaphorical, metaphysical brothers of another mother?
Hear me out. Both of them were/are absolutely convinced of their genius and both argue/d that they have revolutionized music forever. Both insist that music must be an experience, aurally, visually, socially, spiritually, metaphysically. Both of them make great lenses to view historical and contemporary conversations on race and nationalism (more on that later). Both have had public affairs with married women, and had children from those affairs. Both were/are weirdly obsessed with fashion. Richard Wagner wrote lengthy letters to his Viennese milliner to ensure that his sartorial designs were exactly to his liking.
Here is one of his writings to Fraulein Bertha in 1865:
Can you let me have a good heavy satin of light brown by Sunday, two also of dark pink? Is the enclosed shade to be obtained of good quality at from four to five florins? The blue I should also like, but rather lighter than darker. Has Szontag a good assortment of the red or carmine heavy satin with which you lined the white dressing-gown with flowered pattern. Please let me have pattern of the enclosed six shades and materials, and also let me know if you accede to my proposal for a yearly account. This will be most, convenient for me, and in this way I shall be able to employ you continuously. It is to be hoped you still have my measure.
Awaiting your reply,
-Truly yours,
RICHARD WAGNER.
“P.S. — Do not change pattern No. 2, the dark pink for light pink, but for a pink as dark and fiery as possible.”
(http://www.marxists.org/archive/bax/1881/09/wagner.htm)
And in September 2010, Kanye West also discussed his penchant for certain colors and fabrics:
“How many times have people taunted me because of a color that I had on or how tight my pants were? It’s nothing. I’m at the point now where I can go to ABC Carpet and spend five hours picking out sheets, ‘cause I love colors, like teal and taupe and salmon … When I visited Wayne at Rikers Island, I had a suit on with some slippers, and the guard said, ‘Man, those shoes are amazing.’ And I said, ‘Yes, they are. I’m Kanye West.’" (Taken from: http://www.xxlmag.com/news/2010/09/kanye-wests-la-dolce-vita-cover-story-excerpt/)
Here's a list of paraphrased statements said by either Kanye West or Richard Wagner at various points in their lives. Can you guess who said which?
1. My persian carpets must have cherub imagery on them. Why is this such a difficult matter to attend to?
2. I write music with an exclamation point!
3. I believe in God, Mozart, and Beethoven.
3. I always seem to misspell the word "genius." Oh, the irony!
4. There is no astronaut training for celebrity... even though this whole life is so outer space!
6. Wherever the fish are, that's where we go.
7. When I die, I want world leaders to weep at my funeral.
8. I prefer dogs to these doglike men.
When someone yelled to Kanye West that he had no talent, he quickly responded, "I'm Kanye West. That doesn't make any sense!" Wouldn't Richard Wagner have offered the same retort?
The author describes Kanye as "intense, emotional, frequently out of control," and calls him "a narcissistic monster who tore a massive hole of self-regard in the American cultural quilt." But how is this not Richard Wagner? How did the author miss this connection? Kanye is, above all, the American Wagner, not the American Mozart.
What I'd like to offer at some point on this blog is a list of activities/statements that Kanye needs to tackle/make in order to complete the transformation into Wagner. First up, he needs to build his own musical temple. I'm really surprised no one has suggested this to Kanye yet. Honestly. I'm surprised that no one's said, "you know what would be great? If you built a musical temple far away from any metropolis or cultural center. People would have to make pilgrimages to listen to your music as you intend for it to be listened to in a building that you designed to best support your musical endeavors. The building would combine your visual and musical needs, and you'd be in complete control of who participates in your aesthetic vision. Wouldn't that be great?"
This post will be the first of many on these two figures. Both seem to fascinate and appall Zoe and me at the same time. We're drawn to spectacle, to drama, to bombastic, quasi-delusional personalities who tend to shout at us like prophets/prophetesses in the wilderness. We eat up their words like they're little pieces of rich, chocolate cake laced with a diarrhetic. They're delicious now but we'll probably pay for devouring them later.
